I have been wanting to add an extra dimension to Polka Dot Bride for a little while. There are discussions that take place off the blog that need to be thrown into the limelight a little more!

So off the back of this morning’s book review, I have added an extra voice to the blog. She’s an avid reader of Polka Dot Bride and by association is exposed to a lot of wedding talk. As someone who has been married for over three decades I think she has a pretty fair idea of what marriage really is- the ups, the downs, the beautiful moments and the really hard ones.

Budget is a big issue with weddings and it’s one I choose not to talk about on Polka Dot Bride- not because I want to ignore them (I know you all have them and I think the bloggers that cover budgets do it a lot better than I ever could!) but because I hope to provide content that inspires you no matter what your budget. I want to provide you with ideas that help you create a wedding that is truly all about the two of you.

So it is with great pleasure I introduce you to Mother Polka Dot. An opinionated lady, she’s strong, tenacious, brave and the most beautiful woman I know. She’ll be dropping in every now and then and hopefully helping us open up the discussion about some of the real issues and emotions you may be experiencing while planning your wedding and beyond.

mother-polkas-musings

Why are so many of us inspired by weddings that are personal and reflect the beauty and happiness of the bridal couple and their friends and families? Why are the ‘soulful’ weddings the ones that touch our hearts?

Because deep down we know a wedding is NOT about how much we spend, how big and elaborate the cake or dress is, or how expensive the flowers are.  It is not about the ‘show’ you put on, or competition or pretence. Your wedding day is about you as a couple, your love for each other and announcing your shared journey into the future, to your family and friends.

I feel sad that there seems to be so much pressure on brides to embrace certain looks, trends or ideas, for fear of being judged by others as not having the perfect wedding and therefore by association, not being the ‘perfect’ couple who are starting out on their ‘perfect’ life together.

I have been married now for 35 years. In that time, we have certainly had our highs and lows – sometimes low enough to bring on the grey hair that now graces our heads.  We have not had the ‘perfect’ life together, but then, truthfully, who does? We have got through those years by being a cohesive unit, where there is no boundary on what we talk about with each other.  We have been the other’s strength when one of us has felt bereft.  Sometimes, it would have been easier to go, rather than stay and work it out. We have laughed lots and cried sometimes.

We remember our wedding day as only a blip on the horizon of our many days spent together, working out what works for us as a couple, and (later on), what works for us as a family. It serves as a reminder of the start of our life together and has faded in importance as our days together have progressed.