Keeping Nerves at Bay on Your Wedding Day

by | Wisdom


Melissa Polimeni Marriage Celebrant

I’ve had a wonderful summer of weddings – marrying the most lovely and in love couples at some stunning locations. But there was one thing I noticed at all of my weddings – some extremely nervous brides and grooms. Now first up, let me assure you, nerves are completely normal. On my wedding day, I couldn’t stop my hands from shaking or my lips from quivering. It hit me that morning that I was about to take part in a life changing event and while I couldn’t wait to marry my man, I was also incredibly nervous.

There are some key wedding day moments that almost everyone finds daunting. If you’re a bride, it may be the walk down the aisle. Or perhaps you’re both stressing about stumbling on your vows or not being able to control your tears (please note: it’s OK to cry, tears of joy are a wonderful thing). Or the fact that everyone’s looking at you may be a nerve-wracking prospect. Feeling nervous is natural and everyone experiences it. But, what to do about it? Here are my tips for keeping calm during one of life’s happiest moments:

1. Talk the talk then walk the walk
Brides, just before you embark on that magical stroll down the aisle, have a little chat to yourself. Take a deep breath and tell yourself it’s OK – the nerves you’re feeling are normal. Visualise the scene: you know you’re going see a sea of happy faces (and probably smart phones and flashes too). When you catch that first glimpse of your man, expect those butterflies in your tummy to be working overtime! This is a massive moment so naturally it feels overwhelming. But if you talk yourself through it beforehand, you’ll be better prepared.


Reid Studios Photography

2. Love is all you need
As you’re getting ready that morning, remind yourselves what’s most important. You love each other. You’re about to launch into chapter one of an amazing adventure with the love of your life. Your favourite people are watching on because they love the two of you very much. Yes, that’s right, this day is all about love! So try not to sweat the small stuff. Instead, feel the love and your wedding day will be wonderful.

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White Rabbit Productions

3. Lean on your loved ones
Rely on your bridal party. Grooms, you’ve chosen the guys standing beside you for a reason. Ditto for brides. Warn your ‘men’ and ‘maids’ that you’re feeling a little (or a lot) nervous. Don’t be afraid to delegate. And tell them you’ll need their love, hugs, jokes, pep talks and all-round support on the day. They will deliver, I promise.


Matt Elliott Photography

4. Focus on your fiancé
If it helps, block everyone out (for a little while at least) and focus on the one you love. Brides, when walking down the aisle lock eyes with your man and keep focused on him. Steal a kiss as soon as you can – don’t wait to be told when to kiss! Hold hands throughout your ceremony and remind each other to take deep breaths and enjoy the moment. If looking at your guests is all too much, just focus on each other. Let’s be honest, you’ll both look so good you won’t want to look at anyone else anyway!

PDB post 1Julian Meehan Photography

5. Keep calm with a sneaky champagne
If all else fails, there’s nothing wrong with a pre-ceremony sip/glass of champagne. Now I wouldn’t encourage a sneaky champers for curing stress on any other day, but this day is an exception. It will help settle the nerves. It will remind you that your wedding day is a celebration. And in my humble opinion, a wedding is not a wedding without some bubbly!

Swirl divider

Ms Stripey says: Great advice from Melissa with these tips. I’d like to add one more – just remember to savour the moment and SMILE!

About Melissa Polimeni – Marriage Celebrant:

I love weddings (I loved planning my own!) and I love meeting new couples and hearing their story. I have a background in radio journalism so I’m a very confident public speaker and of course I love to write. I regard what I do as such a privilege and I’m told I always conduct ceremonies in a happy, relaxed and engaging manner.


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