Deciding on who to include in your wedding party can be tricky – and indeed stressful! Today, I’m talking about brothers and sisters. Not only your own siblings, but that of your future spouse. Your relationships with them will determine their amount of involvement in the wedding, and you and your fiance are likely to relate to each one differently due to the complexity of relationships.
Many brides will have their own sisters as bridesmaids, with the same being said for grooms and their brothers. It can become overwhelming though with large families, blended families, half brothers and sisters, and your future brother and sister in-laws. So, who do you include when there are “too many” choices?
Unless they make the decision for you and bow out of the competition to stand by your side, then you face a difficult choice. No matter who you choose, if picking one over the other, then favour is being shown. Favour is not to be viewed negatively though as every family’s dynamic is different. For example, significantly large age gaps between siblings can mean that the sibling closest to your age may be chosen, and the other sibling should be able to understand your logical decision.
Some situations are not as straightforward though. The bottom line is to remember that whilst it is your day, its also worth considering how these decisions may affect future relationships with siblings and in-laws.
Try and make the most of the time with your family prior to the wedding and let them know you appreciate them and their involvement. If it is a newly formed relationship with a future in-law then tread carefully – at times we can be quite blunt and honest with our own siblings as we have grown up together – however a sprinkle of politeness with future in-laws will assist in the way you communicate together.
Images via by Milque Photography
Whatever your decision, place priority on these relationships with close family. If you don’t invite them as part of the bridal party, then they may like to be included as ushers, given a reading at the ceremony, or assist with organising your hens/bucks/bridal shower. Honesty is the best policy here: a lot of love and sincerity teamed with a dash of tact will go far.
Ms Chinoiserie Says: Such sincere advice – with a limit to how many you include in your wedding party, family members can be made to feel just as important with other ‘wedding day roles’
Great advice. A little tact goes a long way at such emotional events.