Writing your own wedding vows is a daunting task. However, it really does make for a special and personal ceremony to your beloved! Below are six tips that will have you well on your way to expressing your love in a clear, succinct and sweet way.
Research: You have the whole world at your fingertips – use it! Check out the internet, movies, books, and the bible (if that’s your thing). Read lots of previous vows for inspiration, and you’ll see that there are so many different ways to put together these words. Start early with your vow-writing – it’s particularly hard to write something meaningful at the very last minute.
Structure: Decide on a structure with your partner so your vows are similar, and one reading isn’t crazy long and the other short & sweet. You can start slowly and establish why you want to marry and what marriage means to you. Include what you love about your partner. You could finish by pledging yourself to your spouse, and making promises that last a lifetime.
Things to mention: In Australia, you both have to say “I call upon the persons here present to witness that I, (full name), take thee, (full name), to be my lawful wedded wife/husband,” or words to that effect. Aside from this, you can’t go wrong with the 3 F’s: Forever, Fidelity, and Falling In Love. Personalise your vows and write down everything you can about your relationship – how you met, important times in the relationship, what you admire about your partner, and be sure to include promises. Always use your own language – if you don’t say ‘thee’ and ‘thou’ at home, now is not the time to start. Your vows have to actually mean something to both of you.
Things to leave out: It’s best to leave any surprises for another time. Don’t include anything cryptic or embarrassing, and avoid clichés. In regards to length, use the Goldilocks Theory: Not too little, not too much, but just right. Say everything you want to, with nothing more and nothing less. There’s no right length for the vows.
Write it down and practice: Write down your vows and read them a number of times – you may be surprisingly emotional or nervous on the day. And practice! Make sure whatever you have written them down on is clean – it will end up in photos.
A final word: Remember your vows are just for you and your partner, no one else. They are a response to what’s happening, to the fact that you’re marrying your favourite person in the whole world. Don’t over-think them, and be honest, true to your personality and character.
Ms Zigzag says: The vows are the single most important part of the wedding ceremony and celebration, in my opinion. It’s important to dedicate a good amount of time and thought to writing your vows in order for them to be meaningful, truthful and personal.
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